


I won't disappear

by Kuuttituutti



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff, Gen, Nightmares
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-11
Updated: 2017-12-11
Packaged: 2019-02-13 13:20:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,832
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12984906
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kuuttituutti/pseuds/Kuuttituutti
Summary: Barry has a bad nightmare and Lup does her best to make him feel better





	I won't disappear

She took a deep breath. It felt good to finally have a chance to just breathe. Last few world they had been were really stressfull, and the whole crew was just tired. Everyone was tired of fighting, dying and running away. When the starblaster had finally landed on this calm and peacefull world, everyone was so happy. Everyone had pretty much jumped of joy when they realised that this next year could be a year, were they finally had a chance to just relax. The cold night air felt good on Lup’s face as she leaned on the rail of the starblaster. She yawned loudly and streched her back. Yep, a good nights sleep seemed like a good idea. Silently, she started to walk towards the sleeping quarters.  
As she walked towards hers and Taako’s room, she suddenly heard a loud sob. Lup stopped for a second and started to listen carefully. The sobs continued but they were a lot softer, like somebody was trying to hide their cry. Curiosity got the better of her and she sneaked towards the cry.  
A small beam of yellow light shined trough the littel crack on the door of Barry’s room. Lup took a long breath as she knocked on the door.  
”Barry?”, she asked softly. There was no answer. Only small sobs and crinkling of paper. ”I’m coming in”, Lup said as she stepped in to the small room. Inside she found Barry sitting on the edge of his bed. His eyes were wet with tears and the whole man was shaking. In his hands he had a small piece of paper.  
”Lup? Why… why are you here?” he asked between his sobbing. Barry tried to wipe his face of the most of the tears, but soon enough his eyes were full again and he continued crying.  
Lup sat next to Barry and wrapped her arms tightly around the shaking man. ” I heard you crying and came to see if something was wrong. And to me, it really seems like it” Lup explained and looked Barry in the eyes.  
”I’m sorry I didn’t want you to see me like this. It’s just that... that”, Barry answered quietly sobbing. Lup wiped a big tear from his face and kept hugging him. ”Shh… it’s okay”. For a moment they just sat there. Lup embracing the tired man in a attempt to make him feel better, and Barry wrapping his shaking arms around her.  
After a few minutes Barry started to finally calm down. He took a napkin from the backpocket of his jeans and wiped the tears away. Barry took a deep shaky breath and leaned his head on Lups shoulder.  
”I’m sorry Lup, that I kept you awake” he apoligized.  
”No, no problem. I was still aweke when I heard you, so no problem” Lup answered reassuring Barry and patted him on the back.  
” You don’t have to answer, but if I can ask, what’s going on” She asked carefully, glancing the room around them. A bright lamp had been lit on table. There were couple of notebooks on the table and papers were all around the floor. The whole room just as big of the mess as was the man that sat on the bed.  
” I had a nightmare. A bad one” Barry explained kind of embarrased. ”I think it’s cause like, I’ve been so stressed and like, you know, afraid”.  
”Do you want to talk about it?” Lup asked calmly, letting Barry lean his head on her shoulder, stroking his hair, trying to make him relaxed.  
”I don’t know, it’s kinda of stupid. I mean, you know. It was just a dream”. Barry looked at the paper in his hand again and Lup could see that it was a photograph of Barry and some other people she couldn’t regonize.  
”In my dream, I was home again. Everyone was there. My family, my friends the whole crew of IPRE. Everyone. And they were all so happy. Everything was just like I remembered it. But as the dream went on and suddenly more people started to join in. People I didn’t remember. And I had a feeling I should remember them, but I didn’t. And then i realised, I didn’t really remember any of these people. Their faces became just static and I didn’t know who was who” Barry told. Lup could see that Barry was really close to crying again.  
” I thought I saw you, and I ran to you but then you just disappeared. You turned to dust. And as you disappeared, I realized I didn’t who that even was. I was so scared, Lup. Everyone I tried to talk to just disappeared and then I was alone. And I tried to remember, something, anything, but I couldn’t. I didn’t want to forget” he explained with a shaky voice, face filled with tears again. Lup pulled Barry in to tight hug, almost getting misty eyed herself.  
” So as soon as I woke up, I just tried to remeber everybody. I needed to write down everyones name and who they were. But more I thought about them, the more I realised that, all these people, I will never see them again. They are dead, Lup ” Barry continued, looking at Lup with pain in his eyes. Lup nodded her head slowly. She had also had these thoughts, everybody on the crew had. But of course, it hadn’t hit her that hard. She still had her brother with her and he was really the only one that he really had cared for. But for Barry, he had so many friends and relatives, it was no wonder that he was freaked out.  
Barry took a deep breath and suddenly his face became serious. ”And then I realised, that there is only so much that the human brain can remember. There has to be limit. And now, on this voyage, we have made so many new memories. And we keep making new, and yes, some of those are pleasant, but still. Sooner or later, my brain won’t have room for those old memories” Barry said, worry in his voice. ”So I thought, I might not remember them someday, but if I wrote their names down, so, somebody else might” he said pointing to the papers on the floor. And now that Lup looked at them more closely, she could see that yes, there were names scribbeled in all of them. Some people had longer descriptions, some had only few words, but almost every paper had some stains left by tears.  
”Hey Barry. You know what we are going to do now?” Lup asked with small smile on her face as she stood up from the bed.  
”What?” Barry asked, kind of confused wiping his eyes.  
”Grab your pillow, you are going to sleep with me and Taako this night” Lup annouced smiling happily. Barry looked really confused for a second, before he started to ramble.  
”Wait wait what? No, no I can sleep here, I’m okay, you don’t need to worry..”. Lup silenced Barry with a single stare.  
”No, you are not okay. And you don’t even know how many nightmares Taako used to get when we were little. I know how to handle this. What you need right now is a cup of tea and a sleeping buddy. Also, I have an extra matress in my bed, you can take it” Lup said as she took Barry’s blanket. Barry started smiling happily, but still kind of embarrased.  
”Thank you, Lup”, Barry smiled and took the pillow and started to walk behind Lup towards the twins’s bedroom. He tried to walk as quietly as possible, he didn’t want to wake up any more crew members.  
She janked the door open quickly, not really caring, if she had woken up her brother or not. She had. From the top bunk of the bunkbed Taako’s head rose, hair on a messy bun.  
”Lup what the heck? I was already asleep” he said tiredly, slamming his head back to the mountain of pillows.  
”The nerd is going to sleep with us this night. Hope you don’t mind cause he is not going anywhere” She answered as she saw Barry standing in the doorway, looking a bit shy.  
”Yeah it’s fine. Just let me sleep, please. I need my beutysleep!” Taako murmured in to his pillows.  
”Yeah you surely need” Lup laughed, as she saw a long middle finger rise from the pillowfort.  
She took the second matress from her bunk and layed it on the floor just next to the bed. For one time on this voyage she was happy, that she had gotten the bottombunk this year. Usually she and Taako had some sort of competition or a duel to see, who would get the topbunk. Taako hand won this round. She threw Barry’s blanket on the matress and started walking to the door.  
” Make yourself comfy, I will fetch you some tea” she whispered at patted Barry on the back. He smiled and nodded hugging his pillow. He sat on the mattress. He could hear Taako as he snored quietly. Their room was kind of a mess, but it seemed comfortable. And before he even realised, had Lup came back with a mug full of tea.  
”Drink up, it will make you feel better” she smiled as she jumped on to her bed. She took off her boots and placed her necklace on the nightstand. Barry took a sip of the tea and looked at Lup, blushing.  
”You didn’t really have to do this. It was just a stupid dream” Barry sighed and gulped down rest of the tea.  
”Well, I didn’t want you to wake up more people” she giggeled and layed down.  
” But really, nightmares are not a nice thing. And you seemed pretty freaked out. I want you to know that you are safe. And after seeing your room, I didn’t want to leave you there, alone” Lup explained, with a bit of worry in her voice. Barry placed the empty teamug and his glasses on top of the nightstand and just sat there in silence for a moment before he too layed down on the mattress.  
”I’m sorry” He whispered. Lup merely smiled and whispered back: ”Don’t be. Here, take my hand”. She reached her hand towards Barry. He grabbed her hand carefully and stared at Lup.  
” Look at me Bluejeans. I’m here now.You can feel my hand, it’s warm, I’m breathing, I’m alive. And so are you. I will be here when you wake up. I won’t turn to dust.You don’t need to worry about it. Now, let’s try to get some sleep, shall we” Lup gently squeezed Barry’s hand as she whispered those words. Barry nodded, smiling. Lup smiled gently and closed her eyes, but kept her grip on Barry’s hand. Barry closed his tired eyes, still holding Lup’s hand tight. And just for that night, neither of them let go.

**Author's Note:**

> My first fanfic I ever wrote : D


End file.
